Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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