I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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