i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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