if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize