i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize