Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
The best revenge is premature balding
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
