he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
