summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
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