I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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