Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Randomize