I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
