so that wasnt chicken after all
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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