Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
