Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
