Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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