ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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