puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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