whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
