That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
it hurts more in the daytime
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
