Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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