At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
