Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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