i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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