i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Your cock deserves a montage
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
