New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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