You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize