Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
