am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
