I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
