I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
