I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
