how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
