we have pet lesbian snakes
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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