ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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