I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
