His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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