he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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