I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize