I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
he puts the penis in happiness.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
