drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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