after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
