And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
