hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize