I cannot find my penis.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
its not stalking. its research.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
