dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
