Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
The air taste purple.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
