saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
