I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
