One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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