I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
